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Uchiha Jones
Uchiha Jones is a character roleplayed by Cyr aka Anime Phuckface. Pegi18 Dub Background Born in Kansas, Japan he lived with his parents until the age of 4, until they were brutally murdered in front of him. A man took him in and trained him as a Shinoba. At the age of 18, his sensei confessed that he beheaded his parents. Searching for his sensei, Uchiha moves to Los Santos. Uchiha speaks English and Kansas-ese, a mixture of Japanese and English. Uchiha has cybernetic arms, legs, and shoko (penis) from Boston Dynamics in collaboration with Pillbox Medical and SpaceSex. He wears an exoskeleton on his torso as a result from all the combat damage. Cyr has based Uchiha on video games such as Final Fantasy and anime such as Naruto. He uses music to set the mood for his streams. Los Santos Uchiha calls people "fucko" which is a term of endearment from Kansas, Japan. People who don't know him think he's insulting them. His favorite Doctor is Choi, she has helped him multiple times when he was injured in combat. She knows his cybernetic upgrades and how to fix them. Multiple EMT's also know about his upgrades and how to treat his injuries. The Doctors at Pillbox Medical have become accustom to Uchiha's Cybernetic upgrades and how to fix and heal him. Melbert Rickenbacker betrays Uchiha by shooting him in the eye through the head, now he has to wear goggles. Mother seeks revenge for his actions. Eugene Zuckerberg cut off Uchihas original Shoko so he had to order a replacement from Boston Dynamics. Mel and Uchiha question Doc Choi to see if she is the sensei, it is highly unlikely. With no leads on his sensei, Uchiha wonders if he is even in Los Santos. Mother invited Uchiha and others to a Melbert themed party ('''Mel-Con')'' at the strip club. Otto-tune sings Mel a song, Vinny does a strip tease, and Kelly does a bike show. Mel blows up a bunch of cars and burns himself. Uchiha gets run over by Jordan at the end of the filler episode. ('''non canon according to cyr')'' Uchiha sees Vinny at Pillbox and they fight. He tells Choi that he wants to kill Vinny. Uchiha drives around on his motorcycle looking for Vinny because he wants to beat him up. Having no luck, after a while Vinny calls him. They meet in front of his house and fight, both of them get knocked down to the ground. In the end they make up and everything is back to normal. * https://www.twitch.tv/cyr/clip/PunchyHandsomeArmadilloItsBoshyTime * https://clips.twitch.tv/FantasticPunchyTomatoPogChamp Trivia * Uchiha learned how to pick up women from the video game Super Seducer. * Uchiha likes to tell mother jokes/burns. * Uchiha helped Snake with the Bovice prison break. * Uchiha went to a concert at an empty bar to watch a man sing a song for Mother. * Mr. Chang is Uchiha's mortal enemy, mentor and business partner. * Uchiha hates blackjack and racing. * Uchiha once ramped Lil Erf's car onto some power poles. (1 , 2 , 3 ) * Uchiha once told Karen to drive FAST! resulting in her being ejected from her car and dying (1) Realms 6th Realm The 6th Realm is a place of higher existence. Very little knowledge is known about the 6th Realm. Uchiha has claimed to have gone there for a long period of time. He explains that the portal to the 6th Realm only opens up every 500 earth years. The only ways to enter are, DMT and high intensity sex with a Sakura-chan, or a Portal Kombat tournament. Mr. Chang has said he has been to the 6th Realm. Heck Realm The Heck Realm is basically hell with a lot of demons planning to invade the Earth Realm. Earth Realm The Earth Realm is where humans exist. Uchiha has to save the mortals from the incoming demon invasion from Heck Realm. 7th Realm the 7th Realm is made up by Ramee. Its utter nonsense and does not exist according to Uchiha. Quotes "SAY IT! YOU THINK IM A FREAK!" "See Ya Fucko!" "I don't expect you to understand." "You got got." "Prone Bone Style." "I could have dropped you like a sack of rice." "Relacc" "Goog" "LS Thots" "I'm simply jesting" "The best of the best of the best, Sir! With honors." "Oishii desu ne" "SHA" "It's your life, take a chance" "SILENCE MHORTALS!" "Diagnostics suggest..." "Natural selection, baby." "A lot of people want to know just who I am, well I'm Uchiha." "My old man'' is Jecht, and Jecht is sin"'' "You ever just do some DMT and listen to Nickleback?" "SLEEP" Signature Moves * Ichipunch * Prone Bone Style * Clam Stacking * Car Hood Sliding * Self Cucking Inner Monologues Uchiha has dark inner monologues in which his vision turns red. They happen after interacting with other players. *https://www.twitch.tv/cyr/clip/ObliviousSuaveDillSquadGoals *https://www.twitch.tv/cyr/clip/IcySlickWoodpeckerRitzMitz *https://www.twitch.tv/cyr/clip/TransparentBrightTermiteBudStar *https://www.twitch.tv/cyr/clip/ThoughtfulHedonisticHerbs *https://clips.twitch.tv/RichRacySaladRlyTho *https://clips.twitch.tv/FreezingGracefulAnacondaHassaanChop Arcs First Arc Need info on arc before he lost his limbs. Nugget Arc Also known as '''Chocobo Arc' Uchiha wakes up in the hospital with no more limbs because Ricky and his gang kidnapped him and took his limbs. Ricky needed them to walk again. Uchiha acquires prosthetic legs which resemble huge bird legs (Chocobo) from Boston Dynamics. He claims that they sent the wrong prosthetics. During this time he goes around telling people he lays eggs and they can't have them. People call him a 'freak' because of his bird legs and beat him up a lot. His eggs become coveted for their nutritional value. 'three eggs equal three lives' *Uchiha Jones s01e36 (Dubbed) Depression Arc ''Also known as '''Devil May Cry Arc' Uchiha acquires upgrades from Boston Dynamics in collaboration with Pillbox Medical, at a price. Dealing with becoming more machine than man, Uchiha expresses great edgelord depression in nearly every conversation he has. It is during this stage where Uchiha seeks purpose by developing a signature move, later to become known as the Ichipunch. Incest kun Arc After accepting being denied by Sakura-chan, Uchiha expresses feelings of attraction towards his adopted 'mother. *https://clips.twitch.tv/WanderingPatientBarracudaTwitchRPG *https://clips.twitch.tv/ArbitraryGoldenWrenPicoMause *https://clips.twitch.tv/TubularAggressiveBeefKappaWealth Heck Realm Arc After being knocked out failing to rob someone's house, he wakes up in ''Heck Realm''. There's an alien standing at the front desk in Pillbox Medical. All the lights are off, everything is dark and foggy. *https://www.twitch.tv/cyr/clip/PlausibleUglyBorkChocolateRain Race Arc Snake and Uchiha (Raiden) enter the race as a team. Uchiha has a cool waifu car. (more info needed) Detective Arc Chang becomes a private detective and invites Uchiha to join him. Their office is located in the back of the strip club. Later Vinny and Ramee join the detective firm. Multiple people have joined and helped them on cases. They have 100% case closed record. '''Rose was hired as Uchiha's assistant. The First Brenda Case Lang Buddha hires Chang to find out if Brenda is cheating on Saab, little does he know Uchicha and Brenda have a complicated flirtatious relationship. Chang and Uchiha do recon to get evidence. They spy on Saab and Buddha having a conversation, Uchicha takes notes. They go to the hospital to talk to Brenda. Buddha "dies" in the hospital bed. Chang tells Saab that Buddha said, "to forget about Brenda and fuck other women." He tells Vinny and Uchiha to seduce Brenda, they bring her to the mansion to for a setup. Chang feeds her lies, and the plan fails. Brenda, Saab, Chang, and Vinny talk it out on the sidewalk while Uchiha spies in a bush. Chang tells them to break up for a day so he can have a 100% case closed record. Case Closed The Cheating Pimp Case Erin seeks help with her pimp boyfriend who she believes is cheating on her with a pink haired woman. She gives Uchiha her number. Erin calls Uchiha for any info. Uchiha says that Alabaster said: "ya im cheating bitch, she a hoe". Uchiha tells Erin to try and get under Alabaster skin to see if he really cares about her or not. Uchiha says, "I bet I can make him cry." The Police Officer Case Officer AJ Hunter wants them to investigate Conan Clarkson for any diseases. (Chang does the rest) The Scammer Case Uchiha posts an ad on the yellow pages to bait the scam caller. The scammer calls him and tells him he has a lot of charges on his record and needs to pay a fine for his warrant. He tries to connect to his phone with fast support but fails. Uchiha goes to the bank, the scammer tells him to take out 999 dollars out of his account. The scammer tells Uchiha to meet him at tool shop 2 of 2. He tells Uchiha to buy a gift card, then tells him to buy 3 body armor. The scammer attacks Uchiha with a hatchet in the bushes. Chang shoots at the scammer but he escapes. The EMT come and bring Uchiha to Pillbox Medical. After waking up Uchiha witnesses Chang named a hero for saving him and the scammer is caught. Case Closed The Dungeons and Dragons Case A nerd calls Uchiha from his yellow pages ad for help with a mystery. Uchiha meets the two nerds in the parking lot under the highway. After a bunch of arguing Uchiha turns into the Dungeon Master and they proceed to Role Play and roll dice. The mystery was never solved because Kevin Shaw called for help. Case Closed * https://www.twitch.tv/cyr/clip/BrainyClearFriesJonCarnage The Kevin Shaw Case Kevin Shaw calls because he's stranded in the ocean with other people. Uchiha steals a boat and saves them, the EMT land a helicopter on the beach and give medical assistance. Back at Pillbox Medical they thank Uchiha and call him a hero. Case Closed The Jordan Case Something about a woman harassing Jordan. The Ghost Car Case *https://www.twitch.tv/cyr/clip/FunnyBumblingPeachSuperVinlin The Demon Ramee Case Ramee gets possessed by a demon, Uchiha and Chang get help from Saint Jasper for an exorcism. They burn the body twice and piss on him (holy water) then throw him off the dam into the water. Chang jumps in to save Ramee, they bring him to Pillbox Medical. Case Closed *https://www.twitch.tv/cyr/clip/BashfulBumblingGrouseNomNom The Thalia Hayes Case Nino Chavez talks to Uchiha and Chang about a girl hes currently having sex with who's getting to emotionally attached. The plan is for Uchiha (fuckbeast 4000) to fuck her prone bone style. The Bovice Case Mother requested information on the location of escaped convict Bovice. She's worried that shes on his kill list. The 2nd Bovice Case Doctor Choi wants to know if Bovice is now TJ. She is also worried about his violent past. The Who is Jesus Case Buddha wants to know some information on Jesus. Uchiha believes Jesus might be willing to give him some information as long as he continues to act vulnerable. The Rudi Rinsen Case "He woke up in his house, bloodied up, blood everywhere. Face wounds. Missing right eye. Note on the ground "Friend, I found you took you to witch doctor, took care of you, eye is gone" No idea whatsoever what happend. Rudi was having a few beers at his OWN bar. Last thing he remembers wasn't a result of drinking too much. Driving school with Tessa, Reed called him MULTIPLE times. Called Tess multiple times. Nobody picked up. couple hours later he called Tess again. She picked up, she said he heard his phone ringing multiple times but he was focused on driving. She also told Reed that she left him in harmony at the repair shop. Apparently Rudi took a phone call, took a few steps back he appeared agitated and said for her to leave him there because he would get picked up. She doesn't know the name of the individual who called." * Doesn't suspect anyone from his shop is a lead. * No current enemies. * No suspicion that Tessa is involved. * He doesn't recall anyone in Harmony at the time. * He doesn't recall anyone following them during the driving test. ''- Uchiha's Notes.'' Uchiha talks to Reed, he has no new info. Uchiha goes to Chang to talk about the case. They go searching for Tessa for any leads on the case. Uchiha talks to Tessa in the parking lot about a driving test, they exchange numbers. Big cash reward. The Jordan Stabbing Case Chang stabbed Jordan for $20,000. Jordan wants to know who paid him to do it. In reward for the information he's going to let Uchiha and Chang park at the hospital without tow. Uchiha tells Chang, he agrees to tell him who did it but at a cost. They take Jordan to an undisclosed room under the ruse that they work for homeland security. They talk about Jordan's past. Chang spills the beans and says it was Allen.'' ''They drop a bunch of shit in the room and Uchiha lights a campfire causing Jordan and himself to pass out from the smoke. The cops breach the room and everyone catches on fire. Case Closed * https://clips.twitch.tv/TentativePeacefulSheepWoofer The Zack Case Kevin Shaw wants Uchiha to investigate Zack. The Ghost Sakura Case Kayden calls Uchiha from the grave, she wants to be resurrected. She said Jordan fucked her to death. They go pick her up in a parking lot and Chang drives them up a mountain to start the ritual. A bunch of hillbilly folk start to shoot after them. Uchiha gets shot and they drive him to a house. In his state, Kayden gives him CRP, Uchiha pulls Kayden back from the dead. They walk outside and look at the sunrise in the rain. Case Closed Inception Arc also known as '''Faintception Arc' After crashing his car with Mel, Uchiha faints, then faints within that faint, and then faints within the faint within the faint, entering 'faintception' limbo. After being transported with a helicopter to Pillbox Medical, Uchiha wakes up convinced everyone are projections from the 'faintception. He cant remember where he was before entering the ''faintception'', and wants to get out. He starts to wonder if he might actually be inside Mel's faint, since they fainted around the same time. He meets Mel, who takes on his anger of Eugene on Uchiha, probably confused after spending too much time in limbo. Uchiha reveals to Mel, that his ''shoko'' doesn't work, which leads him to believe he's 3 faints deep. He thinks he has a mission here, but he cant remember what. He asks Mel to help him get out of the ''faintception''. Mel gets a call from Eugene's phone number, but its not Eugene calling, which reinforces the belief that Uchiha and Mel is stuck inside Mel's faint. Uchiha wants to jump of a crane in order to get out of the 3rd faint, but Mel's projection of Eugene tries to stop him. Uchiha tries to take out a vehicle, but since Mel doesn't believe Uchiha has any money, he is unable to. He starts climbing the crane at the construction site, believing the fall will give him the kick to get out of the faint. Uchiha calls 911 saying he's gonna jump off the crane, to which they respond with "please don't do it. It isn't worth it". He calls Khloe asking about the first time they met, in order to find out if she is a projection or not. She doesn't answer the question. Uchiha reveals to Khloe that his ''shoko'' is his totem. She tries to convince him that this is the real world. ''I'm waiting for a Crane. A crane that will take me far away. And i know that i hope where the crane will take me, but i can't be sure, but it doesn't matter. Because we'll be together. ''- Uchiha to Khloe Uchiha tries to explain the faintception to Khloe, but she does not understand. She climbs up the crane and meets Uchiha, who feels that this Khloe is a bit different, probably because of Mel's perception of her. Hedi(?) also climbs up the crane. She says she remember his mission, to repopulate the earth and kill his sensei. Uchiha wonders why he needed to go 3 layers deep to complete the mission. Mel stands on the crane across the one Uchiha is on. He says the mission is to push Khloe off the crane. He says it will wake them up because they are in her dream. Uchiha starts to wonder if he can trust Mel, since he might be a misprojection of Khloe's security. Uchiha asks Mel when they first met, something he cannot remember. Mel tries to convince Uchiha he's real, but Uchiha is very skeptical. Mel suddenly remembers the first time they met, which makes Uchiha believe they are in Mel's faint. Mel says that if Uchiha push off the EMS on the crane, he will wake up, which means they will all wake up. Uchiha asks how many are in the ''faintception'', to which he answers "the entire city". Uchiha doesn't know who to trust, since he can't remember the mission. Uchiha then wonders if he's in his own faint. Khloe left to a call, which makes Mel believe the faint belongs to the other EMS, who stayed. Uchiha asks the EMS if she induced the faint. She says a simulated fall can give the kick without potentially killing him. Uchiha contemplates whether he should jump or not. After talking to the EMS he decides to leave the crane and find another way to leave the faint. Uchiha feels apathy toward other people because he believes they're all projections. Uchiha gets another call from Mel, who says he's still on top of the crane. Uchiha thinks him and Mel might be connected within the faint. Mel wants Uchiha to catch him. He says he's invincible and that they are in his faint and if he jumps off the crane they might exit the faint. Uchiha says that since they are 3 layers into the faint, time goes 3x slower, and they can do whatever they want. Mel wants to go 1 layer up and gets Uchiha to climb up the crane he's on. He meets Mel on top of the crane. Mel picks up Uchiha, saying he will drop him off to get him to level 2. Mel says they have to wake up together, and jumps off the crane with Uchiha. Both get severely injured on the impact and instantly believe they are in the real world because of the extreme pain. Uchiha says they might need a higher jump because the projection is very high quality. They both get transported to the hospital. Uchiha wakes up from the bed thinks they might be in level 2. He talks to Mel and says they're now in level 2. He wants him to ''ichi-punch'' him. Uchiha needs to have sex to see if his ''shoko'' works, it will reveal whether or not they are in the real world. All of a sudden a mysterious voice speaks to Uchiha, claiming to be God. Uchiha is confused. Mel takes a suicide pill, Uchiha takes one as well. Uchiha wakes up in the hospital bed. He checks his ''shoko'', which seems in check to him. He goes up and hugs Khloe, asking how long he was out for. He finds Mel and says they're finally out. He walks by a police officer talking to the EMS who saved him about a potential 51-50. He runs out of the hospital. Now he just wants to see Choi. Stripper Arc "You've been a very, very bad boy, Uchiha." - Mother During a ''Ladies' Night'' hosted by Mother at the Vanilla Unicorn, Uchiha is pressured by many of the women in attendance (namely Brenda and Karen) to perform a striptease for them. While performing, Uchiha begins to question the moral and social implications from being a stripper; asking Mother if she is “disgusted with what your son has become?”. * https://www.twitch.tv/cyr/clip/WrongCheerfulShrewPeanutButterJellyTime * https://www.twitch.tv/cyr/clip/AttractiveStormyCourgetteBrainSlug Fan Dub Arc Uchiha went to Pillbox Medical to get fixed up; while there a new doctor messed with his OS and prosthetics. The Doctor turned off Uchihas Japanese accent giving him an American one. Uchiha believed he had achieved his ultimate prone bone form and went rogue in search of LS thots. Chang was very upset about this and with the help of Karen and Garrett managed to kidnap Uchiha and take him up north in an attempt to reboot his system at a back-alley surgeon. However since none of them had any cash, they had to return to Pillbox and convince the Doctors to reverse their upgrades. * https://www.twitch.tv/cyr/clip/HelplessFamousMonitorTTours * https://clips.twitch.tv/RoundKnottyFennelDatSheffy * https://www.twitch.tv/cyr/clip/SassySmilingSwanCurseLit Missions / Quests # ''Quest Accepted''. Uchiha had to search for Alabaster Slim, multiple people told him he was missing. Apparently he wasn't missing at all, Gomer told Uchiha he was talking to him on the phone. ''Mission End'' Fighting Tournaments Uchiha has joined many fighting tournaments but he has never won. June 5th Fight "Episode 991" - Anime Phuckface * Round 1: Uchiha wins vs Reed, being cheered on by Choi. * Round 2: Uchiha loses vs Buck. * During the Battle Royale round, Uchiha hides on the side and wins because Eugene gets cuffed by Jordan for hitting him with a bat. Sakura-chans / Women Trouble Hedi (First Sakura-chan) In search of love, Uchiha finds a Sakura-chan who leads him on only to have a boyfriend who is a cop. Brenda At one point Brenda starts to show feelings for Uchiha only to friend zone him. At this point they are both really good friends and flirt with each other. They text a lot. Brenda is currently dating Saab. Brenda told Uchiha she likes handcuffs. "Trust level: 0" * https://www.twitch.tv/cyr/clip/AttractiveAttractiveWallabyDansGame * https://clips.twitch.tv/AbrasiveRenownedRuffDuDudu * https://www.twitch.tv/cyr/clip/GoldenYawningTireSquadGoals Mother Mother is always supportive of Uchiha. She has tried to help him in the past to find a ''Sakura-chan, Even setting him up with a date. During the '''''Incest Arc Uchiha was expressing sexual feelings towards Mother. Doctor Choi They have a very good friendship and Uchiha keeps on self cucking. They text and hang out a lot. Uchiha see's her a lot when he gets injured. Uchiha likes to talk to Choi about his quests and the LS Thots. Whenever he goes to Pillbox Medical, he always requests to see Doctor Choi, and when she is not there he misses her. Choi broke it off with LaBarre because they were diffing apart and she was having feelings for Uchiha. Choi wants Uchiha's Head Uchiha was talking about an LS Thot while being treated by Choi at Pillbox Medical, this upset her. She wanted Uchiha to open up a case to find his heart. Uchiha declined because he is not good with emotions. Uchiha tells Choi that he could be a better Doctor ''than her. ''"how hard can it be?" ''Choi won't let him operate on anyone, but he tried to multiple times. He asks Choi if she ever has done a little bit of weed and operated before. She says ''"I would never do that, I would lose my job." ''(1) * Choi threw Uchiha into the ''Heck Realm by accident, this upset Uchiha. * Uchiha calling Choi his girlfriend for the first time. * Uchiha always wants Choi to do drugs with him but she always declines. First Real Date Uchiha and Choi went to the beach to smoke a little bit of weed (Smoking Weed ) and relacc. Uchiha Tried to Ichipunch a local but failed and got hit. They sit next to a fire and talk a little bit. They take a walk along the beach in the water and he passes out. Choi carries him back to his car and drives to Pillbox Medical. She goes on duty and makes him all goog. "Trust level: 100" * https://www.twitch.tv/cyr/clip/EagerAntsyWaffleOptimizePrime * https://www.twitch.tv/cyr/clip/ProductiveTentativeShrewDerp * https://www.twitch.tv/cyr/clip/SecretiveBigBottleKappaWealth * https://clips.twitch.tv/HeadstrongMoistRadicchioJKanStyle * https://www.twitch.tv/docchoi/clip/ExquisiteCoweringVanillaCoolStoryBro * https://www.twitch.tv/docchoi/clip/SparklyTardyHawkSwiftRage * https://clips.twitch.tv/PoliteDrabAntYouWHY * https://www.twitch.tv/cyr/clip/GentleOnerousRavenAMPEnergyCherry * https://clips.twitch.tv/RichDistinctPeachAMPEnergyCherry Khloe (Pink Haired Sakura-chan) Khloe is an EMT, she is very nice to Uchiha and likes to give him hugs. Khloe called Uchiha and said, a stranger was in her bed and for him to come to her house. Uchiha quickly drives there and she gives him a tour of the house and they never go to her bedroom. They text on the regular. When asked if she was jealous of Uchiha's and Choi's relationship, she pleaded the fifth. Officer Dupont One time thing with Dupont. *https://www.twitch.tv/cyr/clip/BovineProtectiveWombatNotLikeThis Officer Angel Once Uchiha called Officer Angel m'lady and flirted with her. Kayden (Ghost Sakura-chan) Once Kayden was a ghost and Uchiha flirted with her, and she liked it. He had to "fucked her back to life". Jordan wasn't happy about this. Ellie Dono Ellie Dono is Uchiha's personal taxi driver. Rose Rose is Uchiha's personal assistant at the Detective Firm. Jean (LS Thot) Uchiha meets a new sakura-chan who is down to fuck. Jean give him her number and he calls her later that day. * https://clips.twitch.tv/SpoopyAbstemiousAsparagusPoooound * https://clips.twitch.tv/DrabAmusedStinkbugPJSugar * https://clips.twitch.tv/RockyPolishedGaurDoubleRainbow Openings / Endings Videos Gallery maxresdefault.jpg|Uchiha and Chang Uchiha Moto Heck.png|Heck Realm Uchiha and Trish.jpg|Uchiha and Trish winner pov.PNG|Winner POV vlcsnap-00053.png|Heck Realm image0dfdf.jpg|Uchiha and Chang talking it out.PNG|Talking it out Mr-Chang-and-Chawa-Race-Chang-Crashes-and-Uchiha-Dies-GTA-V-RP-GTA-5-Roleplay-Lord Kebun.jpg|Chang and Uchiha at Pillbox hugs.PNG|uchiha and choi hug uchiha lean.png|Uchiha leaning on his car uchiha and choi beach.png|Uchiha and Choi at the beach